MY FREE FAMILY… HITS THE ROAD ONCE AGAIN
I am tired. No, I am exhausted. Physically I feel like a superhero. I eat healthy. I workout regularly. I haven’t been sick in years. I feel better than when I was in my 20’s… but, mentally, my dear friends, I feel like something that has been dragged down an empty highway at full speed… for an entire year!
Just weeks ago I was happy to leave 2017 behind… a year filled with tons of emotions, but most of all, decisions and, even more… indecisions. As in sync as I feel with my other half, it has been some time that I have had the sensation that we were sinking…me and him, grasping at each other, arm in arm… and pulling our two daughters right down with us… caught in a place, a normal apartment in a nice, residential area to be exact…a place that seems right on the outside (ask just about anybody that isn’t us), but on the inside feels entirely wrong… we got comfortable (a routine of lessons on Mondays and Wednesdays, track on Tuesdays and Thursdays, friends every other Wednesday, and on weekends when we are not away for work… errands at the same time, running at the same time, sex at the same time (and, of course when we can fit it into our schedule!)), and now we are numbly floating somewhere in the middle of where we are and where we know we ought to be… too depleted by the status quo to swim ourselves to shore.
There are days that pass me by. I watch them pass as an observer, not really understanding what is happening… completely out of control of mind and body.
So, I jumped into 2018 with vigor and enthusiasm and gratitude… or, at least I thought I did….
But, after only three weeks… I am still floating and it has become too strenuous of a task to bear.
We are tired. No, we are exhausted. Andrea, I… and our two daughters. And this is why, the other morning I looked at Andrea, and Andrea looked at me, perfectly in sync, and said, ‘ENOUGH!’.
It is time to HIT THE ROAD once again… freedom is a lifetime chore like a healthy body, a sane mind, and a satisfying marriage. Get too dependent on your routine, forget who you are, ignore your real needs, and you are bound to sink… which could likely reveal itself through various symptoms such as: not being able to get out of bed in the morning, not being able to sleep at night, eating your way through boredom and melancholy, and/or an overall loss of your smile, spirit and zest for life.
In our case, all of the above.
This, however, is when I knew that it was really time:
The other morning, after sleeping for over 12 hours, I couldn’t get out of bed. I changed my shirt so that it didn’t appear as if I was still in my PJs at 2 in the afternoon (as if anyone was actually noticing). The sun was shining outside. It was my perfect type of day… except on that day… on that day… I just felt like staying inside ALONE… crying between one almond butter and jelly sandwich and the next, stuck between one messy regret and the last. I tried to convince myself that it was just a lazy day, but I knew… I was smack inside a moment of my own life… a moment that I could no longer tidy up by vacuuming, dusting, or putting it into the perfect words... I knew, it was a symptom of a my total state of confusion, anxiousness and fear. A long cry from our days in Central and South America when we were far from problem-free, yet, the emotions we experienced -both good and bad- always left us feeling perfectly ALIVE.
People see the job, the house, the after school activities and all the technological toys as stability. But, we, like most of the people that we see around us, are living in a constant state of apnea. The apartment walls and the routine is quickly closing in on us.
The definition of stability is the strength to stand or endure.
Endure what? Our lives?
It is also defined as a situation in which something or someone is not likely to move or change.
Who wants that? I want to evolve BABY!
So I ask: When does too much stability turn into the loss of your smile, spirit and zest for your LIFE?
The need to change is not running away… it is running forward… evolving… becoming a better you… creating a better life… (remember the lifetime chore?)
You can’t possibliy do this if you can’t come up for a breathe of fresh air. Apnea has to be temporary. Otherwise, we die.
Once again, it was time to ask myself… ourselves… what next?
Happiness is not something that happens to us. You need to make your own.
After we both said, ‘ENOUGH’, we felt better, relieved, proud of ourselves and united. But, then what? I remembered the rules. So did Andrea. He coached them hundreds of times. I wrote them down in a zillion different ways. So, we decided. But, as he coached and I wrote, there is never any real decision without action! What should we do? Where should we go? Do we have the courage to move our daughters out of their comfort zone… lessons, track, friends, family?
Whatever and whereever it would be, we both knew that it had to be NOW! Wait and both the moment and the momentum will already be gone. No turning back, no doubt, no excuses, no fear.
So, here we are… DECIDED… somewhere in the middle of where we have decided to no longer be and where we are heading… too determined to make 2018 the year that we once again swim off to some other shore.
Another adventure. Another jump outside of our comfort zone… our family, moving forward and… on the road once again…
Now or never. First stop: France. Departure: TODAY!
Hope you will join us for the ride… not as a passive observer, but as a travelling companion (each in his own, unique way) directed for an incredible place called…
LIFE without Borders!
So thrilled to be able to share this with you!
Much more to come… so, if you haven’t already done so… click FOLLOW to automatically receive our future posts.
love and hugs to all,