A journey that lasts a lifetime (almost part three)
Journal Entry, May 12, 2014 (a gift of acceptance):
I no longer resist change. I no longer deny impermanence. I no longer fear my freedom. The concept confuses me and excites me, stimulates my emotions. What is freedom for me in this very moment – will I be able to recognize it or will it pass by me unnoticed? Like my own shadow, it plays hide and seek with me all day long. Sometimes I am unable to see it even when it dances before my very eyes…
I see it when I choose not to give into buying a new pair of shoes that I don’t need.
I lose it when I fuss over a messy room or when getting to the gym is more important than listening to a friend’s troubles.
I recognize it when we can stay in bed till noon on a rainy, Wednesday morning.
I miss it when I take for granted the sweetness of a goodbye kiss.
I create it when I fill the room with the wonderful smell of home-baked bread.
I destroy it when I complain about too many boxes and too little space.
I re-discover it when I do an unexpected act of kindness for a complete stranger.
It escapes me when I yell at my daughter for a mismatched outfit or knotty hair…
when I am too busy to enjoy my husband’s arms around me.
If only I could capture it and put in a bottle.
I would keep it close to me forever!
But, I can’t.
None of us can.
So we accept its impermanence –
we embrace it while it lasts
as we continue taking our baby steps, one moment at a time
until we learn how to walk, run and maybe someday
even leap towards this amazing pleasure called Freedom.
To be continued…
With joyous impermanence,
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Baby Steps to Freedom (Detours and Potholes) (part three)